I blew through this book in a haze of tears and anguish.
Valerie's boyfriend, Nick, shot up their high school. This never happened to me. I didn't have a boyfriend in high school, and no one shot anyone in the commons area. But it's happened to others.
How do you go on when the person you love takes a list of people who hurt you, shoots them, shoots you in the leg when you try to stop him, and then shoots himself?
I'm not sure I could have.
Valerie was plagued by misery at school. She and her boyfriend were picked on and harassed, called names, beat up, and so on. You know the story. It happened to me, too.
While feeling particularly sad and angry one day, she starts a list. A Hate List. On it when everyone and everything that made her life miserable. She never imagined Nick would take it so far.
She never imagined she'd be the one who stopped him.
She never imagined that shortly after Christy broke her mp3 player, she'd be trying to stop the bleeding in Christy's stomach from a bullet in Nick's gun. She just thought Nick was going to tell her off. She didn't know he was going to shoot her.
Nick was her Romeo. Nick was her solace through high school pain and an unpleasant home life. He's the one who told her that even though most of the time they were losers, 'we all get to be winners sometime.'
And now he was gone.
How do you go on when everyone blames you for what happened?
Ginny's face was never the same again. 'Being pretty isn't everything, but sometimes being ugly is.' I know that feeling.
Had she lost everything? Could she end it herself?
Questions pour out of this book like tear drops.
People are people, in all their ragged, selfish, cruel, beautiful glory. You can find part of yourself in this book.
All you have to do is read it.